“Alright Cuz, like I said. We offer a combinissive package.”

“Do you mean comprehensive?”

“Yeah you know what I mean. Anyway, get up with me.”

Compton OG Lee-Locc daps up rapper Handspring Crank and leaves his rented condo.

It’s the Georgia native’s first trip to Los Angeles, which as a gangster rapper, means one thing: choosing which gang to be extorted by.

“I like what they had to say. They’re offering on demand security, a couple visits to the hood per month, and a photo op with Tookie’s nephew,” Crank says while peering through the thick pamphlet’s blue pages.

Since the days of Biggie rapping, “my team in the marine blue, six coupe,” gang members throughout the country have had a mutually beneficial relationship with street rappers. Gang members provide security and credibility for rhymers, and the gangs would get a piece of the action from rappers traveling through their native cities.

Now it’s Cranks turn to decide who he wants to “check in” with when he visits LA. Crank notes he has no plans on getting involved in criminal activity in LA, but, “if n*ggas say we gotta ‘check in,’ that’s what it is.”

Blood member Wack 100 has recorded a proposal video offering to throw in a “free fade” for a limited time.

Crank calls the “Check-in hotline” of the Blood gang. He wants to re-confirm some details of their packages before making a decision. He gets placed on hold, and puts the phone on speaker while waiting.

“Thank you for Ballin the Bheck-in line,” a cheerful voice says. The recording then lists the rappers currently paying the gang for protection. “We hope you choose to bool with the winning team today!” A voice finally answers on the line, and Crank asks about the “K Dot package:”

“You get on call security, and a team of BGRs (Blood Gang Representatives) ready to go the club or film Instagram beef videos defending you,” the agent says. “Guns would be charged on a separate basis. It’s ideal for artists who just want security and don’t desire close affiliation.”

“But with the Soulja package, I can claim Piru right?”

“Affirminate. You can wear a flag, even call yourself Brank.”

Crank thanks the agent, and hangs up. He looks at the private, encrypted Bloods website—which is surprisingly well put together. He says he will sleep on his decision, and call one of the gangs in the morning, “in time for 1Oak tomorrow night.“

When asked what would happen if he doesn’t choose a gang, he says he’d be put on the “No-Fly list.”

“No clubs, no good weed, no nothing. You could get robbed or anything. That’s like buying a car without insurance.”

Crank has 72 hours to make his decision, or both gangs will initiate the “no fly registry process.” What’s the process?

“They show up to your crib strapped. All that professional s**t is out the window.”